Drinking and skiing are a smart combination. Your choice of beverage might not be particularly clever, but we’ve all got to stay hydrated. So no matter what you’re sipping on, there are a few constants- 1: It’s unwieldy to carry a bottle while lapping the park. 2: You want your drink to stay cold. 3: Grubby little bastards are always trying to steal drinks.

I’ve felt the pang of loss when a stash of Sam Adams goes missing, and I wouldn’t wish that on any of you bastards. I’ve chosen some good hiding spots, and I’ve chosen some failures—here’s what I’ve learned.

1. Be sure you don’t put your stash in a high traffic area. Every park has a few of these, and they tend to occur at the start of the jump line or right before a popular rail setup. This will probably be the first place you think of because it’s just so convenient. But you’ve got to realize, it’s convenient for those grubby little kids who would love nothing more than to chug your beer and tell the story to their friends the next day.
2. Beware of melt. Its spring and you’d be surprised how quickly your sixer will go from cozy and cool to hiding in plain sight.
3. Stairsets tend to have nice hollow, shady, snowy gaps under them. Be sure to keep rule #1 in mind, because stairsets can tend to occur in high volume spots. However, if you’ve got an out of the way setup, just dig a tiny tunnel right under it and enjoy ice cold brews for the rest of the day.
4. All of the above issues can be avoided if you just keep a cooler in your trunk. This isn’t an option if you’re forced to park in the gaper lot, but for help with that issue I’ll refer you here.