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Top 3 with Jack B.

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The kid brother of the Traveling Circus crew, Jack Borland, has been on the mad come-up in Yoke edits this year.  He is also surely helping Saga to make sure tight pants will be flying off the shelves next holiday season when all you nerds donate your tall-tees to Goodwill and start dressing like Dustin Dollin.  Jack goes through his top 3 favorite tricks.  Our favorite?  Nosepress.

iNi Welcomes Kieran McSlay to the Fold

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Another edit of justice from the Timberline hype factory that is Jeffrey Kohnstamm featuring the lazy flow of Kieran McSlay.  Kieran was recently added to the iNi Cooperative ski team, an Oregon-based brand that is back on the come-up with some industry vets in the fold.  According to (what we imagined) intern Jeffrey Kohnstamm (would say), iNi Cooperative seeks to:

“Unite da bredren of Jah the most high by breeding product dat avoid da phallacies of Babylon resource use, da bald heads an’ aile dat downpress ma bredren.  Follow back a mi ca all fruit’s ripe jah bredren, ah sey one!”

While you can use this rastafarian dictionary  to translate what that actually means, I’ll paraphrase what I already made up Jeff saying to note that iNi, a clothing line that used to be run “by some wannabe rastafarian burnouts” is now under the control of some more established heads, including Scotty Conerly, who used to manage Pollard, T-Hall, Sammy C. and co. as Dakine’s TM.  Apparently moves are under way to de-rasta the brand, although having John Spriggs on the team with his 6-foot plus frame draped in yellow red and green and hideous dreads seems like an interesting strategy to satisfy such an end.  Some cool pieces are already in the line though (with minimal Bob Barley-influenced details) and I’m all for saving the planet.  Which is of course why I’m road-tripping through Oregon with my snow tires still on.  Shame on me.

Dane Knakkerhaard at Mountain Creek.

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Dane Knakkergaard holding it down for Jersey.

Exhibit A: Safety Grab

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Parker White’s gonna have to trademark that safety grab sooner or later, because there’s no doubt it’s going to be #trending hard next season.  Just a little free business advice for Mr. White this Friday afternoon.

Team Yoke: Kill All Posers

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Shane McFalls’ edit for Team Yoke for the West Coast Sessions.  Talk about a twofer’ this Friday!

Wet Hot American Springtime

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A very well shot (Jon says: boring) jump sequence and a lot of messing about in the Squaw park. Babes forever.

Idea

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Idea was one of Eric Iberg (correction: and Eric Pollard)‘s pre-rasta pieces of genius, and was pretty much the first ski movie that really gave much credence to style.  This was when Andy Mahre and Pep Fujas skied park on Hellbents with no poles, Mahre doing a stalefish grab years before it blew up as the grab to grab this season.  This movie set the stage for the Nimbus webisodes to follow, and includes the same soft-film look and slow music.  Enjoy a classic and big ups to Nimbus for putting this movie out (a year ago).

The Leak: Yoke Goggles

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As spotted on a super secret media sabotage mission deep in the Mt. Hood… mountain, clothing pranksters the Yoke Collection will be adding goggles to their 2013 winter offerings.  Erik Olson makes them out of a tinfoil mold stuffed with hot glue gun glue, and the lens material was salvaged from the set of Chips.  Word on the street from initial testing is that they fog up immediately and are very uncomfortable.  The Yoke Gogglinators will be available wherever scum congregate, and wherever EBT cards are accepted.

Good Squad Whistler

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Ah, man.  Being totally badass and shit!

BroBomb Signature Session at Windells

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It’s about this time of year we should be writing about summer camps and where you should spend all of your awesome money to ski.  Assuming you are old (late 20’s) like us and would never get in an airplane to go ride park (other than Big Bear), you should definitely go ski powder in Argentina this summer with Garrett Russell and have a totally rad time scoring fresh lines for days on end and then drinking really cheap, great wine and red meat.

But now that I’m done giving a nod to my former employer, I’m here to present the first ever BroBomb Signature Session at Windells.  Tailored not to the mobs of rich children who sweat bullets for FlexFit hats from their favorite ski company but for the aging everyman skier who totally sucks at park skiing now but feels entitled to stay in the scene because they saw 13 on VHS.  This Signature Session is not so much to improve your skiing but to master your sarcasm and bitter outlook on life while being associated with skiing.  Here are the 10 principal activities of the Windells/BroBomb Collabo Totally Signature Session for the (assumed 25+) Cool Kids Only:

1)   Maintaining your “over-it-ness” in the face of hundreds of children and their unadultered joy and enthusiasm for skiing.

2)   Walking away for a solo smoke break when all the kids are clambering over each other to secure a brand new sticker.

3)   Napping or reading The Economist until the kids crash from 9 hours of non-stop activity and then practicing backflips in the foam pit while no one is watching.

4)   Watching ski edits together long enough to get you pumped for the next day, but not long enough to make it seem like you’re actually entertained by other people skiing.

5)   Casually meeting the pro coaches while acting like you have no idea who they are.

6)   Afternoon sessions trying to prove to the children campers why their heroes are idiots.

7)   History classes explaining why the history of African-American culture is actually very much separate from that of modern-day skiing.

8)   Very sporadic sessions on the hill working on straight airs in the halfpipe, 360 grabs, and maybe a backflip.  BroBomb campers will have a separate lunch-time barbeque spot where the cool coaches will come to escape from the campers and the BroBomb campers can drink beers and complain about being in the presence of children.

9)   As the most important quality of an aging action sports participant is to “get it,” lift rides will be spent talking shit about the one dude in the group who doesn’t get it.

10) Dressing in mad tall tee’s, skiing in the back seat, then signing totally stoked kids’ foreheads with a Sharpie claiming you’re Tom Wallisch.

 

The first annual BroBomb Signature Session at Windells is taking place between the Nevergonnahappenteenth of July and the Inyourdreamsteenth of August.  Sign up never!