It’s a scary time in the ski media world. Several notorious ships that had been anchored at their respective ports for a good long while have just in the past month drawn those rusty weights from the bottom of the sea and sailed off for distant and in a few cases unknown horizons. First Matt Harvey left his post as senior editor at Freeskier with no obvious candidates to replace him. Maybe Nate Abbott will just take that spot over and publish more of his own photos, but it’s too early to tell. Then came the announcement that freeskiing’s jowled frontman, Jeff Schmuck, would be ending his ancient (for the internet) history with Newschoolers and would move on to be an editor at SBC Skier, an interesting career move given that the 70 people who actually live in Canada pale in comparison to Newschoolers’ 187,000 registered users. Maybe he just wanted to watch print media die first hand? Maybe Prime Minister Stephen Harper wanted Canada’s most successful ski media personality back working for the home team.
For the brain hurricane category
Oh, baby! Usually lifties at dumpy ski areas just get to pick up rental gear from the tourists who eat shit trying to get off the lift. This time they get to meet hot chicks who bang them out in the lift shack and then suck them into shitty drug deals and want to mule coke back from Columbia! Mike Rogge has the full details.
Remember us? That’s right, Team fuckin’ BroBomb. We didn’t make it into the Orage Masters, but that doesn’t mean we’re not going to be representing to the fullest this weekend on the side of the course. We’re going to try and bribe a cat driver with meth (or beer, whatever they’re into in Idaho) to build us a little ice bar for the Team BroBomb party zone. Beers will be drunk en masse and, as promised, a cattle will be slaughtered and its bloody, meaty flesh will be served in burger form to the masses. Will we shave a quarterpipe into the side of the bar and have a handplant contest? We have no idea, and make no promises.
At any rate, rest assured that with Hot Possie leading the charge, no one will be boozing harder. Want to come along? Sun Valley’s offering an $80 ski/stay package. Or you could just sleep in the parking lot. It’s April. At any rate, we’ll be partying, and we’ll be handing out plenty of free beer, so if you can make it to support the hesher pirate entourage of Team BroBomb, be there.
*In other news, it’s come to our attention that Dunfee broke Shane McFalls’ espresso machine the other week while in Salt Lake. Any readers selling bottom-barrel refurbished espresso machines, please e-mail ryan @ brobomb.com immediately. Many thanks.
( Ensler ) I’M JUST GONNA ASK YOU A FEW QUESTIONS
AND JUST ANSWER WHATEVER YOU’RE COMFORTABLE ANSWERING.
DON’T GO ANY FURTHER THAN YOU FEEL LIKE GOING
AND IF YOU WANT TO ADD SOMETHING LATER ON
TO A QUESTION I’VE ASKED YOU, THAT’S FINE TOO.
WHEN WAS THE FIRST TIME YOU SAW IT ?
YOU KNOW, IT WAS SORT OF LIKE A N ACCIDENTAL THING.
THERE WAS LIKE A MIRROR ON THE FLOOR,
AND I WALKED UP AND I WAS LIKE, WHAT, WHAT WAS THAT ?
I HAVE TO GO HOME AND DO SOME RESEARCH.
The day you never thought or even really knew to expect has come… snowboarding’s BroBomb, Yobeat, has sold to ski media conglomerate and serial contest reporting machine Freeskier. Must have been a lot of cats in that bonus check for Brooke Geery…
It’s the farthest Andy’s ever been from a steady supply of chicken wings. Thank God they have vending machines dispensing french fries, or he might not have made it. Want to know more useless details about the TC Japan trip? Here’s the lowdown from filmboy Shane “Sake” McFalls, who think you should really buy the BroBomb Mid-Season Facemelter Sale Package:
On the indoor ski resort: “It was really icy. I was on Andy’s skis that didn’t have edges, so it wasn’t very fun. It was still a cool idea, it was still fun, but it was crazy icy. They did let us do whatever we wanted. We didn’t have a lot of time, because we had to get to a dinner with a head honcho dude at K2, so we only got a few ours there and only got to move a few things around, but if we had been there a full day it would have been pretty neat. It had a super sketchy pipe and two permanent jumps, and a ton of rails that they’d swap out. But it was solid ice – I couldn’t sidestep up the steepest part.”
Nick Goepper with another volley in the battle for your hearts and minds. Wood rails, one footers, nose butters, creative transfers, and not a single dub. WHAT MORE DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM HIM?? Haha. Can’t wait to read the comments on this one…. and it turns out, I didn’t have to wait long, as reader Sam Turner put together this great little addition below:
From an anonymous reader:
There’s some things you should know about me… As most of us head drearily towards adulthood, up mountains all over the world you will find an elite band of Peter Pans staving off real life in pursuit of a few more sweet turns. Addicted to the nectar of slaying groomers, and angulating to the correct degree, pity these fellows who in reality lie trapped in a bizarre snow globe of sin and vice, trussed up in a nice red jacket and pushed out to face the baying mob. Here are their secrets:
1. Despite what I say, I am never ‘stoked’ nor do I ever wish to be.
2. You falling over is not my problem, it is the second hour of the lesson now, you should be better at following me where I want to ski.
by reader Tom Finn
Everyone loves a comeback. Tanner Hall, Candide Thovex, and CR Johnson are just some of the athletes who have returned from horrific injuries to the top of the sport of freeskiing. With the X-Games now over and contest season in full-swing, I’d like to air my predictions for those most likely to make a comeback and be seen gracing the pages of magazines as “2013 Skier of the Year.”
Colby James West
Photo from Jacob Wester’s blog.
More known for his late night infomercials and comedic personality than skiing prowess, Colby is fresh off a busy filming season where he appeared in exactly zero movies. We are going to guess that he spent all of that free time training to represent his native New Hampshire for the USA in the debut of slopestyle at the Sochi Olympics. West escaped the collapse of CoreUpt skis just in time to launch his bespoke line with that Austrian company whose name everyone mispronounces as “castle“. He is likely now riding on equipment that will not delaminate in mere hours. The extra training time and updated gear should make him a serious contender for the AFP points total this year.
*We (Dunfee) messed up while rushing through his inbox to find something to post, and mistakenly credited the previous rant to Cy Whitling, which reader Joe Sanders had actually penned it. Will the real Cy Whitling please stand up?!? Well, yeah.. anyway, you get the idea. Here’s what Cy actually wrote (illustration is his, too):
Skiing is judgmental and that is a good thing. Periodically a pro or industry figure will pen an article bemoaning all the judging and competition that is going on in skiing. They will talk about how skiing is about style and freedom, how self expression cannot be judged. They elaborate on the joy that skiing is giving them and lament the judges’ decisions in the latest competition, in fact sometimes they lament the fact that competitions actually exist. I am tired of hearing this. Judgement is a fundamental part of skiing and that is the way it should be.