
Preface: I’m also going to guess that Big Boulder banner isn’t paying for much more than a shitty cheese-steak these days, so I can only assume the reason Brobomb asked me to guest edit their site for a week is because they are too busy working at their own real jobs.
With the ski season over for everyone except rich kids and wicked cool pro skiers, I think it’s fitting to share a short story from one of the summer jobs I had a few years back. This will surely be my wordiest post about the real world of summer jobs and all that stuff. After today I’ll just post videos I think are cool. OK.
I’ve had more part time jobs that I can count on two hands: at sixteen I mismanaged an ice cream store until the owners were forced to close the place, I’ve weed-whacked forty hours a week at a trailer park, and I loaded trucks at a furniture warehouse until the snow fell. But the most notable summer job I ever had was the three summers (and winter breaks) I spent as a school janitor.
The first day on the job landed me right in the middle of a junior-high school epidemic. They called him “The Mad Crapper.” A presumably eighth or ninth-grader who earned super-villain status among the custodial staff. This defecating youngster would mark his territory in stairwells, sinks, lockers, and drinking fountains.
A few other notable summer job highlights:
- While working as a janitor, a teacher asked me for my hall pass. Twice.
- I knocked over an entire row of test tubes in science classroom and filled them back up with water.
- I once weed whacked some dog poop, and it sprayed all over my face.
Hopefully I won’t have to find another crappy job this summer. But, for everyone else who is still stuck weed whacking around dead cats or getting yelled at for not loading couches fast enough; summer sucks!