Skiing has become home to some of the more bizarre examples of snow thuggery. It’d be hard to name a video (not you TGR) that doesn’t have someone twisting their fingers up into some sort of meaningless symbol. That said, you’ll be surprised to hear that I think we need way more gangsterism. Way more.
We recently did an interview with a dude that prides himself on being rather “hood” or whatever silly word he used. When Ryan asked him what the most ghetto thing he ever did was, he responded, “We met some crazy cats in Boston that own a clothing shop. They took our photo and put it up next to a photo of Ludacris.” Sounds scary.
With ski thuggery in such a sad state, here are a few tips to help you actually scare a few people:
- Drop the damn sewing needles: Your home-stitched tall hoodie says, “I am in my mom’s church sewing club,” not “thug life.” Once you’ve sat down with needle, thread, and some fabulous purple fabric that you found at the craft store, your thug bonafides are dead forever.
- Neck lifts: When your chicken neck pops out from all that huge outerwear, it’s a dead giveaway. If you’re really going to scare somebody, they’ll need to believe that you’re filling out that jacket with dieselness, not six baselayers and four tall-T’s.
- Tattoos: Now that you’ve got your linebacker neck, you’ll need some trashy ink. The neck is a prerequisite for thuggin’, and it’s the only spot you can reasonably flash at a camera when you’re suited up in ski gear. A baby-mama’s name in cursive or that sad-Jesus face will do just fine.
Just a few more necklifts and he's good.
